Am I George or Jerry? I've had this debate with myself for quite sometime which is very odd to the average person I'm sure. Of course who would want to be George... he's always a mental wreck and stressed out beyond all possible means, while Jerry is always calm, happy, and enjoying his life.
The Analysis:
Comparison to George:
1. George is bald.... I am not (well not yet, i was recently told that i will be someday most likely)
2. George carries an overly obese wallet.... while I carry a slim wallet and keep only the essential stuff in it.
3. George freaks out constantly about girls... I... well.. I... ok yes i freak out about girls
4. George likes his Kung Pao Chicken spicy... I on the other hand dislike spicy food.
5. George has dated super models... the closest I got to a super model was when i stalked Naomi Campbell for three weeks and created a hair doll out of the hair that fell out of her head. These days i'm not allowed to be within 500 meters of her, but it was well worth it.
6. George experiences shrinkage... I'm a guy, don't we all experience this.
7. George killed his fiance... while i haven't had a fiancee, i did once drive a girl to see a therapist
8. George is cheap... I am cheap
9. George yells a lot and stresses out... I can't remember the last time I yelled, but i do stress out a lot
10. George likes cuban cigars... I love cuban cigars.
Comparison to Jerry:
1. Jerry is a jew... I am not a jew.
2. Jerry is good with the ladies... typically i'm not so good with the ladies
3. Jerry is funny... while i like to think I am funny
4. Jerry is not a threesome kind of guy... i am not a threesome kind of guy
5. Jerry once date his twin... I have never dated my twin
6. Jerry was the "fastest" runner in high school because he cheated... I used to win at poker because I cheated.
7. Jerry once stole a marble rye from an old woman... while I once stole a tootsie roll from Randall's when I was 6 years old.
8. Jerry agrees that a salad counts as a dinner... while i too agree that salad = dinner
9. Jerry always had a thing for asian women... i've been told i have a thing for asian women
10. Jerry once dated a gymnast... I once dated a gymnast
All in all... it is clear to see who i resemble more. The obvious answer is Elaine Bennis.
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